| game | on the box | players | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Vanish Boom 3D | walk the neon grid arcade in first person, then jack into any cabinet on the floor. | 1 | play |
| Vanish Boom VR | the same neon grid arcade, walked in a headset. put it on and the floor is around you. | 1 | play |
| Mini Golf | 18 holes, physics puttering. par is honest. | 1 | play |
| Minesweeper | the classic, three sizes, no ads on the gravestones. | 1 | play |
| 3D Tic Tac Toe | 4×4×4 lattice. lines hide in the depth axis. | 1–2 | play |
| Neon Pool | 8-ball on a table that glows in the dark. | 1–2 | play |
| Solitaire | klondike, draw one or three. cards snap. | 1 | play |
| Artillery | angle + power + wind. oldest math game there is. | 2 | play |
| Word Fret | spell words down a guitar neck. | 1 | play |
| Lex Trace | daily word-path. one puzzle, everyone gets the same one. | 1/day | play |
| Dot Matrix: XYZ | Glyph-grid courier run: six sectors of machine city between you and the KERNEL. | 1 | play |
| Strip Mine: Craft Later | Punch a tree, craft a pick, dig until the stone shows you what it was hiding. | 1 | play |
| Gone Fishin' | Cast into the dusk pond, set the hook, and keep the line out of the red. | 1 | play |
| Spam Clicker: Cookie Cleaner | Clear the cookies, register the shareware, and live with what it installs. | 1 | play |
| Rink of Destruction | The eternal gear argument is now a contact sport. | 1 | play |
| Wiki User Dungeon | Four hundred and ninety-nine rooms of Vanta Meridian, walkable by compass or by map. | 1 | play |
| Maglev Mesa | Two turbines, one tether, no brakes worth the name. League night on the mesa. | 1 | play |
| ????? | cabinet is dark. the marquee still hums. | ? | locked |
high scores live in your browser. we do not want your email. we want your best round of golf.
| tool | does | status | |
|---|---|---|---|
| MGP Tracker | Gold Saucer point optimizer: rates per minigame per hour, tells you the fastest route to the thing you want. | live | open |
| Session Timer | pomodoro that logs to a plain text file you own. | queued | soon |
| Loot Odds | paste a drop table, get honest expected-runs math. | queued | soon |
| Grid Paper | printable graph/hex/iso paper generator. | queued | soon |
request a machine:
rule for this page: a tool ships only if the sysop uses it weekly. nothing here is a demo.
02:11 rotated logs. disk at 61%.
02:19 lex trace daily generated ok.
02:24 someone pinged port 7777 again. no service runs there.
02:31 checked. no service runs there.
02:31 checked. no service runs there.
02:40 golf hole 9 collision fixed.
03:02 to bed. the counter can count itself for a while.
Every good website is a building. The front page is a lobby, the nav is signage, the footer is the fire exit map. What nobody asks is whether the building has a basement.
The old web had basements everywhere — pages with no inbound links, directories you could only guess. We sanded all that off and wondered why nothing feels like a place anymore.
— draft ends here. the author never published it.
FROM: facilities TO: all staff please stop asking about the door behind the arcade cabinet. it is a utility closet. the sound you are describing is the compressor. do not knock on it in rhythm. it does not "answer." it is a compressor.
Welcome. This site is a shelf of useful machines and honest games. Take what you need, bookmark what you like, and if you ever find something here that seems like it shouldn't exist — you're probably right. Write down where you found it.
metaeden.net is hand-built and served flat. no trackers, no accounts, no cookies except the ones that remember your high scores.
Run by the sysop. Contact: postmaster@metaeden.net. Replies within a few days unless the compressor is acting up.
A dialog box flies towards you at the speed of old copper, "Save Progress?" it asks.